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WHY YOU SHOULD LEARN TO SAY ‘NO’

Here’s a quick challenge for you.

Next time you’re alone say the word ‘no’ out loud.

You’ll find even the thought of saying it out loud with no-one around feels simple and easy.

Why?

Because there’s no potential consequence.

But what happens when you think there’s a consequence?

Saying this little word, becomes a challenge or even impossible!

I worked with an actress a few years ago who had a friend she’d pick up and attend auditions together but it was always her friend that got the part!

She felt she wanted to start going alone so she could practice on her own but was fearful of telling her friend she couldn’t pick her up.

On this particular day during our session, she told me she was due to pick her friend up but she wanted to say no to her.

I listened to her concerns and like anyone she was worried her friend would fall out with her, she would despise her, they would fall out and where would that leave their friendship…

We sat down and worked out a couple of sentences she would use in the phone call to her friend. The call was to plan a time to pick her up.

But this time, it was a call to say she couldn’t pick her up.

My client was nervous and clearly had the weight of the world on her shoulders, but we made a plan.

I can see her now, picking the phone up, dialling and waiting.

When her friend picked up the phone, she exchanged pleasantries before uttering the sentence we had planned.

Guess what happened?

As soon as my client hung up the phone, the relief was clear to see. Her body language was relaxed and she was smiling. She’d made a huge step forward in her personal development and gained back control of her life.

She got a part not too long afterwards.

Saying ‘no’ isn’t a sign of weakness, but a sign of courage and self-compassion.

Is there someone you want to say ‘no’ to?

Is there a part of your life your want to get back?

Comment below or contact me and let’s create a plan for you

By Mike Nichols

Insights and Masterful mental performance coaching for the football (soccer) and basketball player

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