“The measure of intelligence is the ability to change”Albert Einstein
What the actress said to the…
It was still 2013 and I’d helped a professional basketball player improve his scoring in an unbelievable manner and I was hungry for more success.
I assumed because I had helped a professional player improve, there would be people knocking on my door asking to help. This player had also played for England and England, and indeed the GB players could be doing better.
Was I under the radar, did the teams have other agenda’s to improve performance or were they skeptical of my strategies? I’ll never know!
So I reached out to other people in the world and had three successes using NLP strategies and let me share with you the one client that felt the biggest shift.
I was approached by an actress, I can’t for the life of me remember how we connected, but her issue was one I had been trained to overcome and I was eager to help her.
She made it clear, when I visited her house, she shared with her husband, he wasn’t to know she was taking these sessions and so we had to coordinate an hours time slot over six weeks. She felt he may scoff at this type of help.
She would learn her lines for auditions, yet when she stood in front of three, maybe four people involved with casting, she panicked, lost focus and forgot her lines. She was divested at this recurring outcome.
This irrational fear was limiting her potential as she was creating a negative dialogue in her mind which was creating the emotion of fear and panic, leading her to fluff her lines.
We completed the Timeline strategy which got some movement from her, but it was another conversation we had that opened up some valuable information we had to explore further and deeper.
She had a friend. The actress had an underlying issue with this friend which was creating a block and that block was linked to her forgetting her lines.
Her friend would call her and ask to pick her up for auditions, but the actress was getting sick of it; plus her friend tended to get the roles over her. She was in direct competition with her friend.
She was tired of saying yes to her friend and wanted to learn to say ‘no’.
We talked and as I learned more about the actress, we formed a plan which included a strategy to help her say ‘no’ to her friend for the first time.
You may think saying no to someone is easy. Logically it is. But when you attach a fearful thought and emotion to that action, saying no can be the hardest thing to do in the world as we fear the worse.
So we prepared a dialogue both internally and externally until she was ready and I had her back.
She picked up the phone and dialled the number. As she dialled, I could see her tense up. Her shoulders lifted, her eyes widened and she looked imbalanced.
It was ringing!
We looked at each other and I gave her a look of confidence and when her friend picked up the phone, she went straight into character.
I heard every word and as soon as she hung up, her shoulders dropped as though a burden had been lifted and a huge smile came across her face!
She text me a few days later saying she’d got a part and was ecstatic!
NLP is powerful in so many ways as this actress learned and appreciated.
There is a simple formula that many people and coaches will tell you.
An Event leads to a thought, which leads to an emotion which leads to behaviour/actions/performance.
Event – Thought – Emotion – behaviour
It’s these four words that, when you’re ready to make change in your life, you need to understand and begin to become self-aware and learn to change your thoughts.
Although I had success with the actress, I wanted more and was thirsty for knowledge.
Find out next time why I travelled around the North West of England to film 200 basketball players.
If you’re interested in learning more about mental strategy and how it can help you, please visit me by clicking here