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How Can You Help Me? My Journey

The Journey Part 19 – Growth and Change for you and I

“To uncover your true potential you must first find your own limits and then you have to have the courage to blow past them.”

Picabo Street

Without growth and change we become stagnant

The interest I have to help others grows, as do my skills when I listen to others and yesterday I received some great news that has made me want to up my game.

Yesterday I was approached by the director of an online community of around 40,000 people from all over the world with an interest in personal growth, professional development and mental wellness asking if they could use my blog to publish within an article and promote on their new website!

This could lead to more blogs being posted to a wider audience.

Sharing my insights, experience and tips to help others is something I enjoy doing, knowing if you can take just one golden nugget from my words, then they have been worth writing and so I agreed.

This new information led me to research how to improve my blogging skills because now, the game has changed and I want to learn and grow from the best and so I discovered a guy called Jeff Goins who really knows his blogs and from hereon-in, I’ll be making small steps in different directions to grow as a blog writer.

I listened to a podcast he was a guest on which can be found here, to help me understand how blogging can help others and generate money, and learned the following golden nuggets:-

Nuggets from Jeff Goins

  • Writing a blog is, in itself a practice and is every growing
  • Writing blogs can lead to Ebooks, webinars, training and tools to share with your audience
  • Run your own race! Be specific in which race you’re running and use a combination of tools, strategy and principles. The tools and strategy may change but the principles set the foundation
  • One of those principles is give before you ask (Heard from Gary Vaynerchuk). Give, Give, Give, ask.
  • Be generous with your audience
  • Make it about them and sometimes, someone may make it about you
  • You can give away your success without asking for anything in return
  • Spread your goodwill
  • Listen to what the people who have done this, have to say and learn
  • Lead magnet rewarding someone for their attention. Start listening!
  • Become a student – Be willing without arguing.
  • The oldest things that have worked for a long time are the strategies that will continue to work.
  • Connect with influential people.
  • Can I write a guest post for you? Can I share this tip with your audience?
  • Case study strategy – Be humble enough to say I don’t know and can I be a case study for your suggestions and insights? People who share advice rarely hear from those who are applying the tips. So when you become the case study of the giants that come before you, you can find yourself in front of the audience.
  • Masterminds – running masterminds growing together. Live events and conferences. Workshops.
  • Do a step by step process for your audience
  • Why Blog? To Spread an idea and to market a product or service I have to sell

What Does This New Direction Mean For You?

Firstly who are you? Are you my ideal audience or are you just a curious window shopper?

There are two audiences I wish to share my knowledge with:-

  1. Professional athletes wanting to overcome a tough time and move on from anxiety to improve quickly
  2. Team Owners/Directors wanting change to improve the results

Taking one of the nuggets above, there are some principles, tools and strategies I would like to share with you and if they resonate with you, then I know we can help each other

Principles Of Values

  • Accountability – Being accountable means taking ownership for successes and mistakes
  • Balance – Knowing what to put down, what to invite in and what to adjust
  • Calm – Letting go of anxiety, stress and bad feelings towards others and appreciating yourself and those you value around you

Principles Of Growth

  • Have a valid reason to want things to improve or change
  • Have an open mind to learning new concepts and perspectives
  • Have an ability to put these new concepts and perspectives into action

Tools for you

There are four areas in which I have experience and expertise I need to share with those wanting to improve…(Click the link to find out more of each tool)

  • 1-2-1 mental performance coaching for the professional athlete. When an athlete is struggling or wanting to remove stress and anxiety, I am trained in helping an athlete connect with their reality, create a vision and use psychological techniques to help them move forward quickly
  • Consultations for teams/clubs. As a director of a national league basketball team that attracted top talent and won promotion in the first year, there are strategies I want to share with the aspiring team or club wanting to win and help them implement them should they need support
  • Blogs. Writing blogs is a great way to share my expertise for free to anyone who has a desire to learn and grow in sports and also to find out a little bit about what drives me. I can categories them so it’s easier for the reader to find a topic.
  • Resources. These free resources give you some strategies to use immediately to help you understand what you can do right now for change and improvements. Why wait! These will grow and change as I learn more from learning from clients and as they learn from me.

Strategy

This I need to work on!

I have the principles in place, I have the tools and now I need a strategy to get me results.

What results am I after?

Sharing as much as I can to those people I feel can benefit and when they are ready, they will let me know and I can support them on a more personal level.

Jeff has a few tricks up his sleeve to generate income that include an Ebook, Masterminds, Workshops, Live events, webinars and training to help the audience through investing their money and it’s some of these strategies I need to learn and begin to roll out.

Perhaps if you’re a former or current professional athlete or a Director of a team/club and have a great audience perhaps I could write a blog for you around mindset and how to quickly change your perspective for improved results?

Yes, you guessed it, that’s a strategy I’m open to trying.

The NEAT System

One strategy I have up my sleeve is a system. A system that incorporates principles and allows me to connect with the right people. That system is called The NEAT System and if you’re still reading this, then you believe in the system.

The system is based on the principles you can’t help all the people all the time and even though I may identify people as needing my help, until their desire to want to improve, becomes greater than their desire to stay the same, the NEAT System or any other system won’t be of any interest to them.

So I need a way to save them time and save me time and therefore energy and allowing me to focus on those who really resonate with what I offer.

As my journey continues, I would like to extend an invitation to subscribe to my blog so you’re notified when I next post and also make suggestions on what you’d like me to write about that can help you as a professional athlete or team owner/director.

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My Journey

The Journey To Become The Most Sought After Sports Mental Performance Specialist Part 18 – What To Do When Shit Happens

“It’s not the shit we face that defines us, it’s how we deal with it.” 

Ahmed Mostafa

Reminding Myself Of The Pain

I started this journey more than a year ago after learning of the frustrations, bullshit and pain professional football players face and it didn’t sit right with me and began to build connections within football around the topic of mental health and how rife negative mental health is in football.

I’ve heard stories of players thinking about suicide, leaving the game and families breaking up and if football is the cause of these outcomes, then something else has to be done. It is something else that has to be done, that I’m driving forward so with that in mind, let’s learn what to do when shit happens, because shit happens a lot in professional football and you need to know how to deal with it.

When shit happens

When shit happens, there’s nothing you can do to change what happened. It happened and you can’t change it no matter how hard you try.

Mental health issues begin when a person tries to justify the event, push it under the carpet or blame someone or something else.

These are the worse things you can do!

What Should You Do When Shit Happens?

The very first thing you should do is accept it happened. Don’t retaliate, don’t make a harsh decision, just let it be for a while.

Don’t ask the question, ‘why?’ for the question Why invites thoughts and scenarios that will drive you crazy as you try to search for an answer that doesn’t exist.

Look Ahead

When shit happens you learn from it. You tell yourself it’s a learning curve and to ask yourself ‘what can I do now to move on from this?’ The answer to this question is, play the game and focus!

Let’s say you scored an own goal. In that moment, shit happened! But there’s still a game going on! You can’t stop playing so you put it to the side of your mind and carry on playing.

Some players allow that mistake to hang around in their minds, distracting them and toying with them and when a player is distracted even further, more mistakes can be made. Even when the game has finished, the player can revisit the mistake and play it over and over again in their mind but for what purpose? To feel guilt, to feel a loser, to change it?

They lose sleep, perhaps turn to the bottle in an attempt to numb the mind and even gamble in an attempt to distract themselves for while. These choices are never great!

Playing mistakes over in your mind doesn’t make sense, mentally or otherwise, meaning the most effective, purposeful act you can do after you make a mistake is to let it go.

This may seem like you’re avoiding responsibility but on the contrary, you’re taking responsibility for improving so the mistake is less likely to happen again, and you’re being responsible for your mental health.

Now I’ve covered what to do when shit happens, let me share what happened to me last night and it has nothing to do with shit happening.

Qatar Connection?!

Last night I was scrolling through LinkedIn and saw a post that Emile Heskey had written, something about feeling nervous when talking in front of ten people and being the person I am, I contributed my thoughts on how to overcome this issue and was pleasantly surprised to see a couple of comments telling me my post was great.

This led to a conversation and a connection and an invite to a podcast in the future!

I believe when someone takes an interest in my work, I have to explore the possibility of it leading somewhere and after a few exchanging of messages, this person had some value he could offer me and perhaps I can do the same for him.

We’re due to chat early next week but it led to me thinking, there are other ways I can help others, succeed, not just football players, for I understand the workings of the mind, and how to change your thinking for improved results in sports, but the principles work in business and life.

Perhaps there’s an opportunity for me to give back to his community in some way? Time will tell.

Roll on Sunday when it’s Father’s Day and I can have a couple of beers as a celebration!